Society Through the Eyes of the HSP
Welcome to the “Highly Sensitive Sanctuary”, where you can explore entries about my life experiences, offering a distinctive glimpse into the world of an HSP (Highly Sensitive Person).
As highly sensitive individuals, our sensory processing sensitivity often leads us to see the world a bit differently. Let’s explore a list of things that HSPs, like myself, tend to find challenging or unsettling about society. Feel free to share your own experiences in the comments, rating them on a scale of 1 to 5, with 1 being not relatable at all and 5 being highly relatable.
Let's kick it off with “Small Talk”.
Yuck, right?
Small-talk is a big one for many HSPs. We thrive on depth in our interactions. That's one reason why large social gatherings can be a daunting prospect; all that superficial chit-chat can feel draining. Now, I can't speak for everyone, but in my experience, these shallow conversations often feel like a waste of time. I'd rather be at home, engrossed in a good book or binge-watching shows. It's not that I'm uninterested in current events or market trends; it's just that sticking to the surface doesn't engage my mind. I'd much rather delve into profound discussions about the meaning of life and our choices. Life is too short for shallow talk. This isn't to criticize those who enjoy it; for some non-HSPs, it's how they connect with others.
But for me, networking events and office happy hours will never be my favorites, even if they sometimes lead to missed opportunities and isolation. It's essential to understand what you're giving up and gaining in these situations so you can make choices that you won't later regret.
Another subject on the HSP dislike list is “Gossip”.
Perhaps it's our empathetic nature that makes us uneasy about talking negatively about others. I understand that not all gossip is necessarily bad; some types of gossip can serve as useful information, helping us navigate the social world and avoid certain threatening individuals. Gossip turns harmful when it's motivated by ill intentions, personal gain, or is riddled with bias and falsehoods. This brings us to our next HSP pet peeve.
This is a big one: “Dishonesty”.
Honesty plays a significant role for highly sensitive people, partly because we're so attuned to subtle cues in people's expressions and body language, making it easy to spot untruths. Or perhaps, it's because we're inherently honest ourselves. Our deep empathy for others, allowing us to put ourselves in their shoes, encourages truthfulness. I've always been brutally honest, and it was a revelation when I realized that most people aren't that way. While too much honesty can be a problem too, so I've learned to be more tactful over the years. Honesty is crucial for building genuine connections. Sharing our genuine opinions and emotions fosters trust. However, it's important to recognize when honesty might not always be the best choice. Highly sensitive individuals who are excessively honest can attract those who value honesty or individuals who exploit it, such as narcissists. Knowing the traits of overt and covert narcissists can help protect ourselves.
The next item builds on the previous: “Exaggeration”.
When people exaggerate the truth or their actions don't align with their words, it's challenging to build trust. With me, for example, despite my skills as a trained actor, I find exaggeration just as uncomfortable as lying. I tend to inherently avoid it.
Now, onto the final item on the HSP dislike list: “Expectations”.
Highly sensitive people are often deep thinkers who question societal conventions and their roles in it. This makes us feel out of place with societal expectations. We don't conform merely because it's expected of us, and when we do, we often end up feeling stifled, often without understanding why. Maybe it's the typical 9-5 grind and the accompanying daily commute that doesn't align with our values. Perhaps we'd prefer to homeschool our children to have more control over their upbringing and protect them from becoming cogs in the machine. Whatever the reason, there's usually an aspect of society that we profoundly disagree with and seek to change within our means. We don't like conforming to societal expectations because we've contemplated life too deeply to follow rules mindlessly. This isn't to say conformity is inherently wrong; it's just not for us because it feels soul-crushing.
Follow your instincts, but also respect what works for others.
It is important to note that everyone has their comfort zone, and society requires a diverse mix of people to function. No one type is superior to the other. We all have our differences, and it's important to recognize where we feel most at home and stand up for our beliefs without apology. But not by disrespecting the beliefs of others.
I wish you a day of nonconformity! And remember: Do something today that's uniquely you.
